What Causes Crohn’s Disease? (Humor)

What Causes Crohn's Disease

As I listened to a podcast from my friend Stephen Dempster on the blog Behind the Times, he raised a good point that immediately got my tired brain working. He stated the following:

The question we should really be asking is not so much “Do you think we will ever find a cure for Crohn’s Disease?”, but rather, “Do you think we will ever find a cause?”

And it does raise a very important question, because how can we find a cure without knowing the cause (or causes…)?  

So I was immediately reminded of some of the theories I’ve heard over the past several years.  

Yes, none of these are to be taken very seriously, but it goes to show you that everyone seems to “know” the cause of Crohn’s Disease – it all depends on who you ask! 

Lawyers say “Accutane causes Crohn’s”

Facebook seems to suggest that “MAP causes Crohn’s”

Certain new age websites write that “An imbalance of your Chi causes Crohn’s.”

dr who what

Some researchers say that “Bad bacteria causes Crohn’s”

Donna from the local health food store says “A lack of Supplement X causes Crohn’s” (Donna conveniently sells Supplement X…)

The priest at our local parish says “Lack of prayer causes Crohn’s”

The shady website I found yesterday says “I know what causes Crohn’s and for $39.99 you can too!”

Parents say that “Too much stress causes Crohn’s”

The person I met at the grocery store says “I had Crohn’s once and it was caused by some spoiled food I ate while vacationing in Cuba.”

Speechless

Vegans say “Meat causes Crohn’s!”

Paleo dieters say “A lack of meat causes Crohn’s!”

The guy at the local pub says his ex-wife causes Crohn’s.

The people at the Close Encounters with UFO’s group say “Aliens cause Crohn’s through an implant they give to abductees”

Conspiracy theorists say the Government causes Crohn’s to keep people tied to the bathroom while the New World Order happens under their nose.

… but what does your Gastroenterologist say?

“We don’t know what causes Crohn’s, but we hope to find out through ongoing research”

Question: What other “causes” have you heard of? Share in the comments below. 

7 thoughts on “What Causes Crohn’s Disease? (Humor)”

  1. For me at this time and date president Trump blubber causes me Crohn’s , more then that, when I watch him on U-Tube my Colostomy bag fills with gas.

    Reply
  2. When I was first diagnosed (in 1978) there were a couple of strange theories – cornflakes? escaped strands from your toothbrush?

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  3. Nicely done. Antibiotics cause Crohn’s; what I ate last night causes Crohn’s; Picking my nose as a kid and eating it causes Crohn’s; That one time at band camp…; That computer virus I had on Windows 95 causes computer Crohn’s I think.

    The true cause of Crohn’s Disease? To get the word out, to spread intelligent discussion, and get people to understand! (See what I did there??)

    Reply

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